Hamlet
shall halt for’t. What players are they?Rosencrantz Even those you were wont to take delight in, the tragedians of the city. Hamlet How chances it they travel? their residence, both in reputation and profit, was better both ways. Rosencrantz I think their inhibition comes by the means of the late innovation. Hamlet Do they hold the same estimation they did when I was in the city? are they so followed? Rosencrantz No, indeed, are they not. Hamlet How comes it? do they grow rusty? Rosencrantz Nay, their endeavour keeps in the wonted pace: but there is, sir, an aery of children, little eyases, that cry out on the top of question, and are most tyrannically clapped for’t: these are now the fashion, and so berattle the common stages—so they call them—that many wearing rapiers are afraid of goose-quills and dare scarce come thither. Hamlet What, are they children? who maintains ’em? how are they escoted? Will they pursue the quality no longer than they can sing? will they not say afterwards, if they should grow themselves to common players—as it is most like, if their means are no better—their writers do them wrong, to make them exclaim against their own succession? Rosencrantz ’Faith, there has been much to do on both sides; and the nation holds it no sin to tarre them to controversy: there was, for a while, no money bid for argument, unless the poet and the player went to cuffs in the question. Hamlet Is’t possible? Guildenstern O, there has been much throwing about of brains. Hamlet Do the boys carry it away? Rosencrantz Ay, that they do, my lord; Hercules and his load too. Hamlet It is not very strange; for mine uncle is king of Denmark, and those that would make mows at him while my father lived, give twenty, forty, fifty, an hundred ducats a-piece for his picture in little. ’Sblood, there is something in this more than natural, if philosophy could find it out. Flourish of trumpets within. Guildenstern There are the players. Hamlet Gentlemen, you are welcome to Elsinore. Your hands, come then: the appurtenance of welcome is fashion and ceremony: let me comply with you in this garb, lest my extent to the players, which, I tell you, must show fairly outward, should more appear like entertainment than yours. You are welcome: but my uncle-father and aunt-mother are deceived. Guildenstern In what, my dear lord? Hamlet I am but mad north-north-west: when the wind is southerly I know a hawk from a handsaw. Re-enter Polonius. Polonius Well be with you, gentlemen! Hamlet Hark you, Guildenstern; and you too: at each ear a hearer: that great baby you see there is not yet out of his swaddling-clouts. Rosencrantz Happily he’s the second time come to them; for they say an old man is twice a child. Hamlet I will prophesy he comes to tell me of the players; mark it. You say right, sir: o’ Monday morning; ’twas so indeed. Polonius My lord, I have news to tell you. Hamlet My lord, I have news to tell you. When Roscius was an actor in Rome— Polonius The actors are come hither, my lord. Hamlet Buz, buz! Polonius Upon mine honour— Hamlet Then came each actor on his ass— Polonius The best actors in the world, either for tragedy, comedy, history, pastoral, pastoral-comical, historical-pastoral, tragical-historical, tragical-comical-historical-pastoral, scene individable, or poem unlimited: Seneca cannot be too heavy, nor Plautus too light. For the law of writ and the liberty, these are the only men. Hamlet O Jephthah, judge of Israel, what a treasure hadst thou! Polonius What a treasure had he, my lord? Hamlet Why,
“One fair daughter and no more,
The which he loved passing well.”Polonius Aside. Still on my daughter. Hamlet Am I not i’ the right, old Jephthah? Polonius If you call me Jephthah, my lord, I have a daughter that I love passing well. Hamlet Nay, that follows not. Polonius What follows, then, my lord? Hamlet Why,
“As by lot, God wot,”
and then, you know,
“It came to pass, as most like it was,”—
the first row of the pious chanson will show you more; for look, where my abridgement comes.
Enter four or five Players. You are welcome, masters; welcome, all. I am glad to see thee well. Welcome, good friends. O, my old friend! thy face is valanced since I saw thee last: comest thou to beard me in Denmark? What, my young lady and mistress! By’r lady, your ladyship is nearer to heaven than when I saw you last, by the altitude of a chopine. Pray God, your voice, like apiece of uncurrent gold, be not cracked within the ring. Masters, you are all welcome. We’ll e’en to’t like French falconers, fly at any thing we see: we’ll have a speech straight: come, give us a taste of your quality; come, a passionate speech. First Player What speech, my lord? Hamlet I heard thee speak me a speech once, but it was never acted; or, if it was, not above once; for the play, I remember, pleased not the million; ’twas caviare to the general: but it was—as I received it, and others, whose judgments in such matters cried in the top of mine—an excellent play, well digested in the scenes, set down with as much modesty as cunning. I remember, one said there were no sallets in the lines to make the matter savoury, nor no matter in the phrase that might indict the author of affectation; but called it an honest method, as wholesome as sweet, and by very much more handsome than fine. One speech in it I chiefly loved: ’twas Aeneas’ tale to Dido; and thereabout of it especially, where he speaks of Priam’s slaughter: if it live in your memory, begin at this line: let me see, let me see—
“The rugged Pyrrhus, like the Hyrcanian beast,”
—it is not so:—it begins with Pyrrhus:—
“The rugged Pyrrhus, he whose sable arms,
Black as his purpose, did the night resemble
When he lay couched in the ominous horse,
Hath now this dread and black complexion smear’d
With heraldry more dismal; head to foot
Now is he total gules; horridly trick’d
With blood of