Smoked

back out and sat on the porch, wondering if I should’ve told the man that Siren believed we were in a relationship that didn’t exist.
I’d been sitting in the same place, taking in the views of my ranch for at least thirty minutes when I heard the front door open.
“He’d like to talk to you now,” said the nurse.
I walked inside and saw Siren sitting up on the same daybed she’d been sleeping on. The doctor was sitting in the chair the nurse had used earlier.
“How’s our patient?” I asked.
Siren looked up at me. “Better,” she answered.
“I understand Siobhan will be visiting Asheville to meet with a stroke specialist.”
“That’s right,” I muttered, not knowing whether an appointment had been scheduled yet.
“To make things easier, I’d like to arrange for her and I to meet either before or after the appointment. Whichever is most convenient.”
“Whatever you want to do,” I said to Siren.
“After,” she answered.
The doctor pulled out his phone and tapped the screen. “Let’s say Tuesday at three, then.”
“I’ll walk you out,” I said when he stood and said goodbye to Siren. “Do you have a couple of minutes?” I asked, closing the front door behind us.
“Sure.”
“Listen, uh, Siren…err…Siobhan—” I stammered.
“You can call her Siren.”
“Okay. Well, anyway, with her amnesia, she…uh…thinks that she and I are in a relationship.”
“She mentioned you were.”
“That’s the thing. We weren’t.”
“I see.”
“Maybe I should’ve told her before now, but—”
He held up his hand. “You were right not to tell her.”
“I planned to today.”
He shook his head. “Please do not. Right now, you are Siren’s rock, if you will. I’m aware she has no family. If you were to tell her that what she believes is her only sense of security is a lie, well, I’m afraid her already tenuous mental and emotional condition may worsen.”
“What do I do if her memory comes back? She’ll know I’ve been lying to her.”
“It’ll be gradual, at best. I’m glad you made me aware of the true nature of your relationship. I’ll be there to help her navigate through it when the time comes.”
“You said, ‘at best.’ What does that mean?”
“After reviewing her chart, I’d say there is a chance Siren may never recover her memory entirely.”
“Look, Doc—okay if I call you that?”
He nodded.
“When I say that Siren and I weren’t in a relationship, what that means is we barely tolerated each other.”
“Hammer did share that with me. He also indicated you were willing to care for her until her condition improves.”
“That’s true, but…”
“But when I said she may never regain her memory, it occurred to you the timeline for her recovery is indeterminate.”
“Right.”
“I don’t know what to tell you, Smoke. Is it okay if I call you that?”
I laughed. “Of course.”
“We’ll keep the lines of communication open. I’d like to suggest you also schedule time to meet with me. Perhaps while Siren is at some of her other appointments. My assumption is that she’ll eventually start physical therapy.”
“I don’t know if it’s necessary for us to meet.”
He nodded. “Think it over and know that I can make myself available if you find you’d like to talk.”
I watched the doctor drive away. Instead of going inside, I walked over to the barn.
“I’m goin’ for a ride,” I told Zeke.
“I’ll go with you if you don’t mind the company.”
I motioned with my head for him to follow.

8
Siren
“Is that Smoke?” I asked Ms. Wynona when she walked into the sunroom.
She looked out the window. “It is. That’s Mr. Zeke, riding with him.”
“Zeke?”
“He manages the Blazing T.”
“Does Smoke have many horses?”
Ms. Wynona sat down in the chair beside the one I’d moved to from the daybed.
“At last count, I believe he had twenty.”
My eyes opened wide.
“The Blazing T is an equestrian rescue.”
I looked back out the window in time to see Smoke and Zeke ride over the crest and out of view.
“He takes in horses other people don’t want?”
“Simply put, yes.”
“I sense there’s a story there.”
She smiled. “I’ll tell you if you agree to eat something.” She picked up a plate of fruit, cheese, and bread and set it on the table in front of me.
Using my right hand, I picked up a strawberry and brought it to my mouth. “Mmm, this tastes really good.”
“We grow them here at the ranch.”
“Will wonders never cease,” I murmured, picking up a second. “What about the story?”
“Some owners are reluctant to give up their horses.”
“What does Smoke do, take them away?”
“Sometimes. If he or Mr. Zeke hear of abuse or neglect.”
While I couldn’t remember much of anything about Smoke or my own life, it didn’t surprise me to hear he’d step in if he thought an animal was in danger. Maybe he did that with people too.
“Mr. Smoke is a good man.”
“Yes,” I mumbled. “I agree.”
“It’s that time,” said Maureen, approaching with a syringe. After the headache I’d had last night and how long it took to go away, I no longer argued with her about giving me pain medicine.
“You have to stay in front of the pain,” she’d explained when it got so bad that she’d gone to the kitchen to fetch an ice pack she then held against my forehead.
“I think I’d like to go lie down in the bedroom for a bit.”
“Of course.” She helped me wheel the IV pole into the room, reattached and turned on the monitors, and asked if I wanted her to stay.
“I have this,” I told her, holding up the pager she’d given me.
“Shall I close these?” she asked, motioning to the blinds.
“Please.” I shut my eyes, waiting for her to leave. When I heard the door latch, I opened them and looked up at the ceiling.
I couldn’t explain it, but a bad feeling had settled over me when I saw Smoke riding away on the horse. Instead of the intense feelings of love I’d experienced since the first moment I looked into his eyes at the hospital, I felt irritated, even angry with him. He’d done nothing to warrant it.
It took a while, but