Let's Make a Deal (Bob and Nikki Book 11)

Let’s Make a Deal
by Jerry Boyd
This book is a work of fiction. All the people, events, and organizations in this book are products of the author’s imagination. Any resemblance to anything in the real world is purely coincidental.
Copyright©2020 Jerry Boyd
Cover image and design by May Dawney Designs 2020
All rights reserved.
This book may not be reproduced, stored, or transmitted, whole or in part, by any means whatsoever without prior written consent of the author and publisher.
Dedicated to my long suffering wife, Donna, and my beta readers, Mary, Bernard, Mary Ellen, and Shawn.
A note about commas, and editing. My beta readers work hard to keep me on the straight and narrow. Anything wrong is probably due to my hard-headedness in not taking their advice. Extra commas you may find scattered through the dialogue, are a blatant attempt at mind control. It’s my way of making the characters sound the same way in your head, that they do in mine.
My understanding of current U.S. Navy usage of the term ‘Commodore’ is as a title, not a rank, used for a Captain in direct command of more than one vessel. In the book, you will find characters moving back and forth between the two titles, depending on the circumstances of the moment. My beta readers felt that it was confusing, I hope this clears up any issues.
An issue was pointed out to me by a reader, Joshua Ahles. The Gene Cernan had originally been (in Lost in Transit), derelict for forty thousand years. In Shaved Ape Key, and Monkey Business, I had shortened that to ten thousand years. Those two books are now corrected, but I wanted to head off any confusion. The proper timeline is that the Commonwealth Navy was mothballed about fifty thousand years ago, and the Gene was found and refitted as a colony ship about ten thousand years after that. Shortly after the Gene was found, the Squirrels did the damage at the Navy yard that Bob and the crew found in Monkey Business. Sorry for any confusion I caused by not keeping up with my own story.
And now, by popular demand
CHARACTERS
Human
Robert Marion “Bob” Wilson A.K.A. Caveman, Commodore, Uncle Bob, etc. The proprietor of Bob’s Saucer Repair, and our narrator. Captain of the Gene Cernan.
Bennikkious Slongum “Nikki” Wilson A.K.A. Space Cadet. Bob’s wife, the first person from the Commonwealth that Bob met. Pregnant with twins, Gus and Becky.
Jimmis Slongum. Nikki’s illegitimate son from when she was at the academy.
Jannul “Janet Wilson”. Girl the crew rescued from a hostile planet, who was adopted by Bob and Nikki.
Dingolus “Dingus Sloan” Slongum A.K.A. Grandpa. Nikki’s grandpa, marooned on Earth for many years, rescued from a failing autodoc by Bob, Nikki, and John. During his time on Earth, he became an expert with the Colt 45, due to enhanced reflexes from the autodoc. Married to Dee. Captain of the Neil Armstrong.
Dee Sloan, nee Delilah Mayfield. Helped find the watch needed to rescue Dingus from the failing autodoc. Granddaughter of one of Dingus’ friends from before he went in the autodoc to await rescue. Dingus was taken by her, and put her in the autodoc to take a few years off. She is pregnant with a girl. One half of the ‘Gun Grannies’.
Regimax “Reggie” “Max” Slongum “Sloan”. Nikki’s dad, Dingus’ son. Running the operation on Earth while the rest of the crew are away. Starting a relationship with Gail White.
John Branham. Bob’s partner and long-time friend. Chief Medical Officer of Bob’s Saucer Repair. Married to Jane, stepdad to Greg. Captain of the Buzz Aldrin.
Jane Williams Branham. Wife of John, mother of Greg. Deputy Head of Medical, Deputy Head of Security.
Greg Williams Branham. Son of Jane, stepson of John. He and his mother were abandoned by his father after Greg came down with a serious illness. Now under the supervision of Pete, a robot Marine.
Diego Cachi. Captain of an ill-fated Space Force mission in a captured ship. He and his crew were rescued by Bob and the crew of the Gene Cernan when they were nearly out of air. Married to Zoom. Captain of the Pete Conrad.
Rizzum “Zoom” Mittus. Used to be an engineer and mechanic for the pirate base on the moon. Bob wanted to hire her the first time he saw a ship she built. Her job interview consisted of getting shot in the butt. Married to Diego, guardian of Nunya.
Billis “Nunya Bizness” Makkum. Zoom’s assistant, skilled armorer. Got her name when she first met Bob, and he asked her name. She responded ‘nunya bizness’, and has been known by that name since. Bob offered to call her by her old name, once she had proved herself, but by then, she had grown to like the name Nunya.
Beatriz Cachi. Diego’s grandma, rescued from a nursing home by Bob’s Saucer Repair. The other half of the ‘Gun Grannies’.
Steve Mason. Army buddy of John’s. Explosives expert. John regrew his leg in the autodoc. Dating Bucky. Captain of the Gus Grissom, a destroyer.
Buckious “Bucky” Bronkum. Guide Ensign, friend of Nikki’s from the Academy. Guide liaison to Bob’s Saucer Repair until the probationary period is up, at which point she plans to retire and marry Steve.
Millus “Milly”. Janet’s friend from the hostile planet. Granddaughter of Alice.
Rhonda White. Cured of cancer by John and the autodoc, in order to get her mother to work at Shady Oaks. (John’s nursing home) Getting caught up on the school she missed while she was sick, while helping out on the Gene.
Gail White. Rhonda’s mom. Starting a relationship with Max, Nikki’s dad.
Jim Bailey. A carpenter, recruited from Shady Oaks. Later rescued by Bob after he was snake-bitten. Acts as counselor to Bob.
Janice Parks Bailey. Jim’s wife, also from Shady Oaks.
Mickolec “Mike” Darning. Sergeant in the Galactic Patrol, Commonwealth law enforcement. Friend of Bob and Nikki. Back-channel source of information.
Tinally “Tina” Whittum. Ensign in the Patrol. Works with Mike, also a friend of Bob and Nikki.
Billous “Bill” Rottum. Major in the Patrol. Used to be a problem for Bob, but