Defending Hannah

but she hadn’t listened. She thought she knew everything about everything and had nothing to worry about.
“You don’t look okay?” Ben pressed, taking her hand in his.
She looked down at their joined hands and noticed the differences between them. His were large and callused over. Probably from all his years holding a weapon and physical labors. They were also tanned. Hers were pale and dainty. Dirt clung under her nails she could never get out. Callused over from miscellaneous escape attempts and fighting back. She tried to pull her hand back from his, feeling embarrassed but he held tight.
“Talk to me, Hannah.” He asked leaning closer to her so their conversation stayed private.
Why did he have to come back in her life? She was nothing special to him. He treated her like she was a guy and never saw her as a woman until that last summer and gave her the best kiss of her life and disappeared. So why did it seem like he was trying to get to know her again? They were still worlds apart from what they wanted in their lives. What good would it do to get to know each other again? All it would do was break her heart all over again and she couldn’t live through that. She had already told him she would help him. What more did he want from her? She wasn’t capable of more. He was a large man and use to getting what he wanted. Probably went through women faster than most men went through underwear. She wasn’t capable of something physical. She doubted she ever would be again. “There’s nothing to talk about.” She told him, hoping that would be the end of the conversation. That hope was in vain. She should have known he wouldn’t give up so easily.
“There is, you don’t like to fly that’s one thing. But something else is bothering you.”
“And why do you care?” Hannah asked facing him. It was a mistake. It put them almost face to face. She could feel his breath on her face.
Ben looked her deep in the eye, pulling her in closer like a spider with a fly. What was it about him that compelled her? He was everything she should despise in a guy. Cocky, arrogant, thought he owned the world, playboy. And yet for all his flaws she still liked being around him. There was something seriously wrong with her. A glutton for punishment.
“Because you have been through enough and it's time someone took care of you.”
Hannah pulled away as if he had slapped her. He cared because he pitied her? What did she expect him to say? He was taking care of her because he liked her? He saw her as a victim, not as a woman capable of taking care of herself. Could she blame him? Their first meeting in thirteen years was her in a bra and shorts chained to a cot. She was screaming damsel in distress even if she did have a plan of escape. “Well, you don’t have to worry about taking care of me. I can take care of myself.” Hannah knew she sounded defensive but he had hurt her pride. She was far from strong but she hated being viewed as weak. She thought she had held up pretty well all things considered.
“I know you can Goldilocks. You are braver than most soldiers I know. You could have been like some of those other women and cowered in fear or ran away screaming, but you didn’t. You faced the danger head on and helped me and with the information you know will save hundreds if not thousands of lives.”
He thought that highly of her? She had never looked at it that way. Adrenaline was pumping through her system and she just reacted. She still wasn’t ready to admit the fact she had killed someone. Adrenaline was what was keeping her going and soon everything would come catching up with her.
“I’m scared to go home,” Hannah confessed.
“Why? I’m sure they have been really worried about you.” He was positive they would be overjoyed she was coming home.
“Before I left my parents had warned me not to go but I didn’t listen.”
“You think they’ll blame you for what happened to you?” Ben guessed.
“If I had just listened none of this would have ever happened.”
Ben reached out and stroked her cheek. Hannah tensed at his touch and looked up at him with tears pooling her eyes. He wiped a lone tear that fell down her cheek. “Please don’t blame yourself. You couldn’t have known. Your parents love you and would just be thankful you are home. I’m sure your brothers will be ecstatic.”
Hannah didn’t feel as confident but didn’t want to contradict him. Her family had ingrained in her that O’Connell must always keep up appearances. Ben wouldn’t care how fucked up her family was and wouldn’t notice her disappearance. Hannah pulled away from Ben’s touch not trusting herself to get too close to him. She didn’t want to get to close to him just to have him vanish again. Her poor battered heart could only take so much. Ben pulled away and sat back but she still caught the flash of hurt across his face. It was better this way. They would each go about their separate lives soon and would have no reason to see each other after she gave him the information he wanted. She would need to try to get her life back together. Find a job; get her own bank account and maybe move out of her parent’s home. So many things ran through her head of what she needed to do that it caused a headache. Hannah closed her eyes and tried to clear her mind. She pictured herself lying on a beach with the waves rolling over her toes. She watched the sun set over the horizon. It was the last thought she had before drifting to sleep.
Hannah woke up startled feeling hands