When the Stars Fall (Lost Stars Book 1)

them to see that I was a girl. I didn’t like it when they looked at other girls. I especially didn’t like it when Jude looked at other girls.
But as it turned out, that would be the least of my problems.
As Brody had said, there were all different kinds of wars, and there were some wars that no matter how hard you fought, you couldn’t win.
That was the year everything changed.
That was the year when one word put more fear into me than I ever thought a word was capable of doing.
Cancer.
“We’re going to beat it,” Derek said, his voice ringing with conviction.
My mom just smiled as he pulled her into his arms and kissed her forehead. She reached for me and pulled me into their circle so I wasn’t on the outside looking in.
I wish Derek had cancer instead of my mom. I squeezed my eyes shut and pressed my lips together, not giving a voice to my horrible thoughts.
Nevertheless, I couldn’t stop myself from thinking it and the years marched on and my mom was losing the battle, I wished it with all my heart.
But some wishes don’t come true.

Chapter Six


Jude
The garden was Lila’s idea, a surprise for her mom who had been talking about it since they’d moved into the house but had never gotten around to doing it. It was the first day of our spring break, and I’d gotten here early this morning, right after Derek took her mom to chemo. Ever since I’d arrived, Lila had been bossing me around, barking out orders like a drill sergeant. Now she flew out of the house and ran across the yard, flapping her arms like an angry bird. A laugh burst out of me. I couldn’t help it. She looked so funny when she was mad.
After she wrestled the shovel out of my hands, I crossed my arms over my chest, feeling the heat of her glare.
“This is all wrong,” she wailed.
She looked like she was on the verge of tears. I was on the verge of telling her to dig up her own damn flower beds. But I wouldn’t. This was for Caroline but mostly, it was for Lila. She needed this and I wanted to be the one to give it to her. Even if it meant sweating my balls off in the April sunshine and being shouted at by Minnie Mouse.
I took a few deep breaths so I didn’t lose my shit. “You said you wanted flower beds. I’m digging flower beds.” I looked down at all the soil I’d dug up. The flower bed was a long rectangle, exactly as she’d specified and as far as I could tell, it was damn near perfect. “What’s wrong with it?”
“I can’t see it from my parents’ bedroom window. That’s what’s wrong with it.” Her shoulders sagged, all the fight drained out of her. “My mom won’t be able to see the flowers.”
I didn’t bother pointing out that her mom would have a clear view from the kitchen window or that she’d be able to see them while she sat on the back deck and drank her coffee like she did every morning. I kept my mouth shut and wiped the sweat off my forehead with the back of my arm as Lila paced across the yard and stopped about ten feet from where I’d been digging. “It needs to be here.”
Would have helped a hell of a lot if she’d decided that before I’d dug an entire flower bed. When I’d arrived, this was where she said the flower bed needed to go. While I’d been digging up the yard and removing the rocks from the soil, she’d been using a trowel to make holes for the plants and flowers. So we’d wasted hours of work on something that she now deemed all wrong.
“You sure?” I asked before I dug up more of her lawn. Wasn’t so sure how happy Derek would be when he saw what I’d done to his grass but unlike my dad, Derek wasn’t concerned with having straight lines when he mowed it. I’d never noticed that before but today it had really bugged me when I saw his uneven lines like he didn’t really give a shit how it looked. I was tempted to take over the lawn mowing myself so Caroline would have straight lines to look at. It was the same with a lot of things at their house.
I’d already made a mental list of things I would fix. WD40 for the squeaky door hinges. The deck needed to be re-stained, and the paint on the railings was flaking. The Weber grill on the deck was rusted and I suspected he didn’t even keep it covered. I wasn’t a big fan of Derek’s and I didn’t think my parents were either but none of us would ever say a word. We all loved Caroline, and Derek was Lila’s stepdad. So even though he had shifty eyes and I didn’t trust him, I needed to keep my opinions to myself.
“I’m sure. That’s where it needs to go,” Lila said, referring to the place where the flower bed needed to be.
I took off my ball cap, ran my hand through my sweaty hair and put it on backward. Her lips curved into a smile that caught me off guard. It wasn’t the first time I’d noticed how pretty my best friend was or how green her eyes were in the sun or how full and kissable her lips looked. But there was something about her smile at this moment that made my chest tight. “What’s the smile for?”
“You,” she said softly, laughing a little, her eyes lowering to her dirty white Chucks. “Thanks for doing this. And thanks for putting up with me. I know…” She lifted her eyes to mine and took a deep breath. “I guess I’ve been kind of bitchy lately.”
I shrugged one shoulder, mesmerized by the way she tugged her lower lip between her