Kink
And in just a few more months she could leave. Get out of this place that reminded her every day of how different she was, how she didn’t fit in, how everyone thought she wasn’t good enough. She was going to leave and never look back.I hate me. I hate everything about me, the way I talk, the way I laugh, my hair, my face, my scrawny body. I hate it all. I can’t change my body, but I can change one thing; my hair. The only pair of scissors I can find in the whole damn house are the big black-handle kitchen ones. My well-meaning mother took the ones from my room, and the ones we kept in the bathroom for trimming, as soon as she found out I was cutting.
This metamorphosis will mark the death of sweet, trusting, and hopeful Elsie. She was killed by a selfish boy in a dark field, leaving behind an empty, bitter, and angry shell.
CHAPTER 5 “In the dark there’s a light that’s calling everyone out, if you could see beyond the walls that you have built. I know it’s hard to escape the past and start it again…”
Lyrics “Old Scars/Future Hearts” by All Time Low
“Hey, girl, what are you up to? Getting people to move better?” Elsie asks Janie.
Janie’s an Occupational Therapist and works in schools, convalescent homes, and private practices.
It’s 10 A.M. and Elsie’s sitting in front of her computer looking through the local film production listings and sending off her resume’. She’s also submitted it to a few short term projects up and down the East coast. Elsie’s last project wrapped two months ago and she’s starting to get antsy, feeling the need to get back to the hectic insanity of working on a film. She knows that, more than likely, nothing will open up until after the first of the year, but she wants to get a head start on the competition. Since Elsie’s been home with downtime, she’s worked on some of her own designs, but it’s a little disheartening when no one will be wearing them. Still, it doesn’t stop her from bringing her ideas to life.
“Good morning sleepyhead, did I wake you? Not everyone’s as lucky as you are and can sleep in,” Janie cheerfully teases her.
“Hah, no, I always try to get up fairly early, I can’t get used to sleeping in. It only makes it harder for me when I’m on a project, and shooting starts at daybreak.”
“Damn, I didn’t realize it could be that grueling. That would totally suck.”
“Yeah, it does, but it usually goes by quick, so it’s all good.”
“Listen, I don’t know if I mentioned it,” Janie begins, “If you don’t have anything to do this weekend I’ve got a 5K run downtown on Saturday morning at 9 A.M.. The UNCW soccer team is going to participate and it’s to benefit the homeless and needy children in the area. It’s being coordinated by Azalea Pediatrics. Would you care to join me?”
“Are you kidding me? That sounds so cool! With all of those sexy ass soccer players, of course I’ll be there. Where’s it starting at?” Elsie couldn’t hide her enthusiasm.
Children have always held a tender spot in Elsie’s heart. She generally prefers the company of children over adults, to her they were genuine, kinder, and more sincere. And the soccer players will just be the icing on the cake.
“At Chandler’s Wharf. I know, I can’t wait. Unfortunately, I’m going to look like a disgusting mess when it’s over. They’re asking participants and supporters to bring an unwrapped children’s gift. I’ll text you with the info link, so you can see what they’re looking for in the way of gift ideas.”
“Excellent, I’m so excited, will any kids be there? I’d love to play with them.” Elsie’s excitement was evident in her voice. Maybe it was because she didn’t have any brothers or sisters and grew up pretty much alone.
“No girl, of course not, they’d see all of their presents and then it wouldn’t be a surprise,” Janie laughs at her.
“Oh, yeah, makes sense,” Elsie says quietly, then laughs at her own silliness.
“Fantastic, so I’ll see you Saturday morning at around 8:30/9:00 and I’ll text you the link. I’m gonna call Elizabeth now, so she and Mr. Man can drag their sexy asses out of bed too. Oh, and heads up, I’ll be the one dressed like Santa’s sexy elf. Bye, Babe,” Janie tells her friend.
“I can’t wait to see you in all your holiday running attire. Bye Honey, thanks for calling, I’m looking forward to it.”
Elsie’s phone buzzes with a text as soon as she puts it down. It’s the link to the charity benefit that’s coordinating Janie’s 5K run benefit. Elsie types the link into the search bar on her browser and begins to look through the wishlist of toys and necessities the kids are asking for. Elsie has a feeling that if the kids don’t get these items from the benefit, they won’t get them at all. Without the event, Christmas would end up being just another shitty day for the kids, except even worse because it’s Christmas. The thought of it fills Elsie with sadness. Clicking on the print screen button, Elsie jumps up to take a shower and get dressed. She needed to get busy shopping.
*
Saturday morning at 8:32 Elsie is turning the corner onto Water Street at the Cape Fear riverfront. The Wharf is only a few blocks from Marco’s building, so Elsie is sure that if Marco and Elizabeth are here, or if they’re coming, they’ll walk. Walking through the neighborhood, she is reminded of why she enjoys Chandler’s Wharf, nestled in its own secluded place in the city, with its restaurants, boutiques, and tiny galleries. She’s carrying two shopping bags, one in each hand, and she’s humming Christmas carols to herself as she approaches the starting point for the race. She starts in on Silent Night, it’s one of her favorites an always