Never Enough

went over to their huge walk-in closet and found the garter belt and stockings. Not the tights, because those had to come off for fun. “Yep, they still fit.” He put on some high heels and walked back into the bedroom. The camera’s red light was on again.
Andy struck a pose.
“‘How do I love thee? Let me count the ways.’” Andy was sprawled on the couch in the green room, makeup smudged, covered with sweat, pants molting, feathers everywhere. Zach was looking at him with concern. Andy cracked up. “You were great, Zach. This whole thing was great. Thank you so, so much. I hope every company in the country sees the video and thinks, shit, why is that guy not working with us.”
“Thanks, Andy. Um, I think people are waiting for us out in the house.”
“I know they are. Throw me a bottle of water?” They got themselves out of costume, cleaned up, and dressed. Andy’s phone had been buzzing nonstop ever since he turned it on. He didn’t bother looking at the messages because the people he most wanted to talk to were all right outside. Zach waited so they could walk out together.
There was an hour of meeting and greeting and congratulations, then a small mob of press outside the club. Andy singled out Sherry Martinez, the Pop Quiz reporter who’d set the whole thing in motion for him, while he and Victor waited for Zach and his fiancée Karen to join them. Then the four of them gave good face for about ten minutes before making their way through the mob to the waiting limo. Andy and Victor were home less than half an hour later. “So,” Victor said, after they were undressed and while he could still think, “are you glad you did it?”
“Honey, I’d be glad for no other reason than that you came home to see me.”
“When will you join me?” Those three weeks apart had felt more like three months. Victor knew it was because of the tour, and the following two
months at home together. He’d been sending a ridiculous number of emails and texts, ostensibly about Shakespeare, simply because getting a reply to each one made Andy seem closer. He’d emailed their counselor, too. Her response amounted to ‘what did you expect.’
Andy wished they had more than one night before Victor was gone again. He wished he didn’t have anything else to do, that he could go with his husband tomorrow, instead of another two weeks from now. “There’s Janis and her concert next week, and then I have the opening for the Tempest show at that gallery. The minute that’s done, I’m on a plane with Molly.”
“No chance I can get back for the concert. Tell everybody I’m sorry to miss it.” He really was. Janis had been a backup musician for those two sets Victor did at Chrome, back in the day. Now she was a Grammy-winning recording artist, about to head out on a world tour of her own, promoting the album based on tango. “Tell her I’ve pre-ordered the album.”
“I’ll do that.” Andy had his mouth on the back of Victor’s neck. He nibbled on that silver chain. “You wore this just for me, didn’t you.”
“Every time I wear it, it’s for you. You wore the jewelry for me.”
“You’d better believe it.” His wedding ring, the Australian ring on his right index finger, and the crocodile cuff. Both hands were on Victor, wrapped around from behind as they both knelt on the bed. Andy brought his right hand up Victor’s side, keeping that cuffed wrist in contact with skin, loving the way his neck relaxed against Andy’s shoulder. He raised up a little, wrapping his left arm over Victor’s chest and changing their angle so he could kiss Victor’s mouth. “God, this mouth of yours.”
“You liked it yesterday.” Victor was breathless, swamped with desire.
“You liked mine.” They’d gone sixty-nine without discussion, Andy on his back with those high heels planted above the headboard. “Still want me to make an entrance?”
“Jesus, Andy. On my back. So I can see your face when you come.”
Andy really hated dropping Victor off at the airport again. He knew he would. They talked about it on the way. Victor confessed to a record-breaking rate of self-abuse. After laughing, Andy confirmed that he’d been doing the same thing. “We had all that time, and it was like even on days we didn’t fool around we could have, right? Then you’re off in Wisconsin or
wherever the fuck and I might not even be actively horny, but just thinking about you being there and me being here, it’s like, gaahh.”
“Exactly.” Victor was smiling. “Sleeping with you, sitting around in the morning with you, hugging you, kissing you. I miss it all so much. And since nothing I can do to myself adds up to any of that, I spank the monkey.”
“Like a couple of goddamned teenagers.” Andy kissed him, because they were together and he could. “Thank you for being here. It was so great to know you were out there.”
“It was so great to see you do that. After watching the video, I really wanted to see you do it on stage. You were gorgeous.”
“Thanks sweetness. It felt good. I mean, it felt like torture for six weeks, but doing it felt good. Being able to do it. I had my doubts there for a minute.”
“You played it off pretty well.” A car honked behind them. “I do not want to get out of this car.”
“Go be a movie star. I’ll be there before you know it.”
“I love you so much.”
“I love you too. I’m not going to get out of the car with you because if I hug you I might not let you go.”
Victor nodded. He felt the same way. He reached between the front seats for his overnight bag, opened the door, then leaned over for one more kiss.
“Hurry.”
The movie shoot was going well, but Victor was