Topsy Turvy Kinda Love
your world upside down with just one sip like Green Chartreuse or Absinthe, but those aren’t exactly shit college liquor. Maybe something cotton candy pink, something that reminds me of the spicy little pixie I can’t stop wanting to call mine. The urge to go home and see if Mia’s there hits me like a ton of bricks because I miss her. Being without her is like not being able to breathe underwater.My heart beats faster with each step I take toward our apartment. The wind is bitter cold tonight, and snow is still falling in crystalline shaped diamonds from the sky. Not enough to lay, but enough to make you freeze being out in it for just a little bit of time.
I can see my breath with each puff out. I pull my knit hat further down over my ears and my scarf just a little tighter. Anxiety spreads its wings wide inside me, not knowing if she’s even home yet. There’s been zero communication about when she’s coming home, and it worries me. I fling open the door to our apartment building and take the stairs two at a time. Quickly unlocking our front door, I fling it open, hitting the wall, but I’m not sure what I expect. At some point I’ll need to stop slamming open the door. That’s what I do know.
Her bag isn’t hanging off the chair like it normally does. There’s no cotton candy and vanilla scent permeating the air.
She isn’t home.
My heart sinks.
Our apartment just isn’t the same without her. There’s no smell of marijuana mixing with the smell of paint as she creates patterns and shapes on the canvas. Her loud, obnoxious laugh is gone as well. It’s lonely. For once, there’s no purple, pink, and blue hair in my shower drain, reminding me I live with a cotton candy haired pixie. I refuse to believe that she isn’t coming back. I have to keep hope alive.
I miss laying with her in bed, being inside her. I’ve become the lovesick guy after only a couple of days. I miss how she chides me at my lack of knowledge about sexual innuendos.
I grab a cold beer from the fridge and plop myself down in my recliner. A smirk crosses my face at the look she gives me every time I sit in this chair. The one she hates so much, but I always catch her in.
Maybe texting her isn’t such a bad idea.
Me: Hey. I miss you.
Mia: Miss you too.
Me: I don’t want to rush you. I know you wanted space, but I wish you were here. I miss wrapping my arms around you and giving you one of my bear hugs.
Mia: I miss that too.
No indication of when she’s coming home, but I still have hope. I have to.
Me: What are you wearing?
Mia: Brooks…
Me: Come on. I’ll start out. I’m wearing your bright red lacy thong and thinking of you. Ya know, this color is actually very ravishing on me if I do say so myself. And the way it cups my balls. Makes my package look nice…
Mia: Oh, my God. Please tell me you aren’t wearing my underwear right now.
Me: I’m not really, that would be super uncomfortable, plus having something in my ass crack all day, I’ll pass. They look sexy as hell on you though.
Mia: I’m still mad at you.
Me: I know you are. Come home, pixie girl. I want to apologize to you over and over again.
Mia: Does that include dick? If not, I’m not interested.
Me: He’s ready and available, waiting just for you, baby.
Mia: Thanks for making me smile, Brooks.
Me: Please come home, Mia. We can talk this out. I don’t want to do it over text.
Mia: I’ll be home tomorrow. I expect flowers, groveling, and your dick with a big ass bow on it.
Me: Anything for you. I’ll be ready and waiting. I can’t wait to see you.
Mia: Me too, Brooks.
I wake up the following morning after tossing and turning all night and race to Mia’s room. I’m not entirely sure what I was expecting. Her bed still sits neatly made and my smile disappears. I know I need to chill out before seeing her again. She might freak out if I come on too strong.
I decide on a workout and run. It’ll do me good to get my thoughts in order before I see her. For the next hour, I let my lungs have it, until they start screaming at me to stop from all the cold air.
Exhaustion pulls in my limbs, and my running clothes are drenched in discarded fear and sweat. I’ve got a plan, now I just have to execute it.
Getting home, I quickly take a shower. Throwing on Mia’s favorite pair of grey sweatpants and a tee-shirt, I make some breakfast quickly and sit down on the couch to wait.
Hopefully, she’ll arrive soon. Ten minutes later, I hear the lock on the door click.
It’s now or never.
The spa day yesterday was exactly what I needed. A day to just relax and try to chase my overwhelming fears and panic away. It hadn’t done that specifically, but it had given me a chance to get my thoughts in order.
The drive home gives me more time to think. I think I’ve finally figured it out. It’s almost like Brooks brainwashed me into having feelings, but somewhere along the line, I started to believe in them too. Who knew that all this love he threw at me would make me believe in it after all.
Bertha made me a muffin for the road and then made a puss face at me when I asked for a coffee. Apparently, coffee is off-limits too, unless I want decaf. What is the purpose of decaf coffee? Instead, she gave me some juice.
I hated saying goodbye to Macy, and she was sad to see me go, but it was time. She understands my desire to