Monkey Business (Bob and Nikki Book 10)
hid inside a wall while they searched the ship. After that, he came out and waited for rescue. When no rescue came, he decided to disconnect his power core, rather than stay awake by himself. He did give me a bunch of useful data.”Taz said, “Better than mine, I hope.”
Sally replied, “Quite a bit better, actually. The captain he was working for was much more adventurous than the one you had. They had several sightings before the idiot decided to open fire.”
I asked, “I assume that everything you learned will be showing up in the simulations?”
“Count on it, Boss. I wouldn’t worry too much, though. They don’t seem to be all that sharp, as far as tactics go.”
I replied, “Then why is it they think they are the baddest thing on legs?”
Sally said, “The ration pack scheme has made them complacent, if you ask me.”
“You mean, we’re better than the monkeys, that’s good enough?”
“I believe that is the way they think, Boss.”
“I have to wonder. Don’t they ever fight among themselves?”
Sally said, “We don’t have enough data to even guess at that, Boss.”
I replied, “Well, you’d think they would be better at it, if they were getting any practice.”
Taz said, “You do have a point, Boss.”
“I’ll have to get a cap to cover it, when we’re back on Earth. Have any suggestions?”
“You could order one from ‘Uncle Tony’s Garage’. Ozzie says he’s learning a lot watching that channel on YouTube.”
“I thought he was into Gale Banks.”
“He is, but Mr. Banks doesn’t post very often.”
Nikki said, “If you two are down to discussing which YouTube channel is best, I think it’s time for you to go to the simulator, Caveman.”
“Busted! Sitting in the big chair sure cuts into my time to shoot the breeze with you fellas. If Shorty has any trouble getting used to the way we do things, be sure and let me know.”
“Sure thing, Boss. Talk to you later.”
Nikki and I headed off to the sim deck. Jasmine was waiting on us. “I was beginning to wonder if you were going to show up, Captain.”
“How long have you been waiting?”
“Not long at all. Sally called me when you left the landing bay.”
“Everybody’s favorite game, ‘Wind up the Captain’. Available wherever games are sold.”
Nikki said, “Poor old Captain Bob. Everybody is always picking on him.”
I just shook my head. It was clear I was getting nowhere.
We climbed into our pods and got to work. The new sims were definitely tougher than the old ones. I was beginning to think that Sally still had her heart set on defeating me on one of these. We finally figured out what they had done to mess us up. The bot running the Sensor console had a vision sensor going out, and couldn’t see the enemy coming in. Once we got a replacement, and sent him to Scotti for repairs, we were able to finish the sim. Nikki shut her console down, so I did likewise. I asked, “Time to eat?”
“Time to pee. Gus has been kicking my bladder for the last half-hour.”
“Why do you always blame it on Gus?”
“He’s male, and he’s related to you. Seems like the way to bet.”
When she got back, we headed to the galley. For once, we managed to walk the whole way without finding anything to fix. When we got there, we saw Snitz hanging out with Nelly and Scott. He saw us and came running. We gave him some pets, and he went back to what he was doing. Nikki asked, “I wonder why Snitz has decided to pal around with them, now?”
I replied, “I don’t. They’ve been through a lot. They need a friend.”
“Do you think John needs to run them through the autodoc?”
“I think that is a question you need to ask Bill, not me.”
“How do you mean, Caveman?”
“Bill is their guardian, not me. I spoke for Janet because she didn’t have a guardian.”
“So, you don’t want to step on Bill’s toes?”
“That, and I don’t know them well enough to tell what they need. It could be that when they have a chance to get used to living aboard the Gene, they’ll settle right out.”
“I guess I’m not quite understanding you.”
“In general, it seems to me that people do better when they work through their problems on their own. Sometimes, like Janet, they aren’t able, and that’s fine, but interfering when it’s not needed just isn’t helpful.”
“You think that it’s important for them to try to figure it out on their own, so they can learn to cope with problems in life?”
“Yep. I know it’s the hillbilly way, but it works for a lot of folks.”
“Is this hillbilly way written down someplace? I think I might need to learn more about it, before the kids get here.”
“Not that I know about. It’s just things you learn, growing up.”
“How are our kids going to learn that?”
“You don’t think their Grandpa Dingus will let them go astray, do you?”
Our supper arrived, and saved me from any more deep conversation. Afterwards, Nikki asked, “What do you have left to do?”
“I need to go train. There are still some of those Squirrel tactical courses I haven’t done.”
“Are you getting much out of them?”
“Not really. So far it seems like they are not nearly as advanced tactically as they are technically. At least, I’m learning what to expect if they come at us again.”
“I hope you finish up soon. They give you weird dreams.”
“Oh?”
“The other night, I think you were trying to cuss in Squirrel.”
“Sorry.”
“It’s okay. I was up to pee, anyway.”
I kissed her, and headed for the ready room. Jasmine was waiting. I asked, “Are all you bots on the coconut telegraph, or