Jillian
knew were super corny, but helped her out and helped her stay on track. Jillian felt like she was gliding home in a star craft, she was so excited. She glided into the day-care parking lot and landed her craft in the spot just next to the handicapped spot, swooped through the doors, and looked through that teeming mass of children to find hers, that little halfie. Half hers, you know.“Hey, Barb!” said Jillian to the day-care teacher.
“Adam!” shouted Barb, and then Adam walked casually out of a little plastic house.
At home, Jillian handed Adam the remote and said, “Now, you sit in here. Mommy’s gotta go do something.”
“Can we eat soon?” asked Adam.
“Oh yeah, dinner’s soon, just watch your show for a second.” It was a documentary about baby animals that Adam seemed to like.
Jillian walked to the kitchen, picked up the cordless, picked up the laptop, walked to her bedroom, and shut the door. It was so exciting, ugh! She dialed the Humane Society and looked at the picture of Carla. The phone rang twice before it was answered. Each step was a thrill.
“Hi!” said Jillian. “I’m calling to inquire about the dog on your website named Carla, the special needs dog?”
“Oooohh, I’m sorry, but Carla was adopted yesterday.”
“Oh, really? Are you sure? Because she’s still up on your web page.”
“Yeah, I’m sure. Every time we put up one of those photos the dogs get adopted almost the same day. It really makes people fall in love, I guess.”
“Yeah, I guess it does,” said Jillian. “Well, maybe you should take it down so you don’t give a misrepresentation of the dogs you actually do have.”
“We have a lot of wonderful dogs in right now. All the time, in fact. Do you want to know our hours?”
“No, not really, I only wanted Carla.”
“Are you sure? Carla’s not our only special needs dog, if that’s what you’re looking for.”
“I’ll think about it.”
“Okay, well, please keep us in mind,” said the woman.
“Bye.”
Jillian clicked the end button on the cordless and sat on the edge of her bed for a second. Then she put a pillow to her face and screamed “fuck” three times.
She set the pillow down, punched it twice, and then said “Mommy’s all right!” and went back to the living room.
3
“And my boss was like, ‘We have to get this,’” said Carrie. “So we walked up to the guy and my boss was like, ‘I’ll give you fifty dollars for that llama,’ and he did it.”
“Oh my god, that’s hilarious,” said Jessica. “Steve, check out this llama at Carrie’s desk.” Jessica handed the phone to Steve. Everyone was smiling.
“That’s a life-size llama,” said Steve.
“We had to carry it back to our office on the bus,” said Carrie. “It almost didn’t fit through the door, that’s how big it was. We almost hit the bus driver in the face with it, that’s how big it was.” A few people laughed. Carrie reached out for the phone. “Here.” She flipped to the next picture. “That’s how big it is.” The photo showed Carrie and the llama, Carrie with her arm around the llama, Carrie wearing glasses and grinning, the llama looking dingy and staring with its dead eyes at the camera, the two of them in Carrie’s well-lit office.
“Oh my god, you look so tiny next to that llama,” said Jessica.
Peering over Bill’s shoulder, Megan could see that Carrie had lots of nice plants in her office.
“I’m so lucky. I love my boss and I love my office,” said Carrie, reaching again for her phone. She gave the photo of herself a little smile before putting it away.
Megan looked across the party and saw Randy by the bathroom. She was trapped between Jessica and a coffee table. To get to Randy would require her to either step over the coffee table or ask Jessica to press herself against the wall, and Jessica looked like she was having a nice time.
“Well,” said Carrie. “I have some cool news.”
It would be rude to interrupt Jessica’s good time.
“You know that magazine Dale Carnegie? They’re doing a thirty under thirty thing next issue.”
And it would really look like she was a wild animal or something if she tried to climb over the table. And plus her ass still hurt, so it wouldn’t be graceful. She’d have to limp her way out of the corner.
“Do we know any of the thirty under thirty?” Bill asked.
“I’ll say,” said Carrie. She was being cheeky.
A girl named Annie walked up to their small group and said, “Hey! Sorry, I was eavesdropping. Is it you? Are you one of the thirty under thirty?”
Carrie nodded.
Megan reached into her purse and took out another beer, her third. The sound of the tab cracking was, she thought, a nice contribution. Cheers! She drank very quickly.
Annie took out a cigarette and said, “That’s awesome.” Annie and Megan had met before. Megan cleared her throat.
“Hey, Annie, can I have one of those?” she asked.
“Oh, sure,” said Annie.
“Randy has mine. I can pay you back later.”
“Oh, don’t worry about it. Really.”
Annie passed her a Camel and then held out her pink lighter, already lit. Megan had to dip her head into the middle of the conversation, which had stopped, maybe pointedly, to light her smoke out of Annie’s hand. Megan straightened, leaving behind a plume of smoke.
“Thanks,” she said.
“It’s cool. I feel like I haven’t seen you in a while, Megan. What have you been up to?” asked Annie.
Everyone was still being quiet and staring, which didn’t really feel polite.
“Well, I cut my ass on a knife in the kitchen sink.”
It was uncomfortable to have four people looking at her and listening to what she was saying. She took a drink of beer while Annie laughed a little and said, “What?”
“I fell in the sink on a knife and cut my ass.”
“Oh my god, are you all right?”
“Sure,” said Megan.
“Did you have