Anna's Secret

No, the truth will set you free.
Just as she was about to tell the truth … a slight rap at the door interrupted and a head poked in.
“Come in, dear,” Pastor Harry said, as he waved her into the room.
Anna had always loved the Pastor’s wife, Eleanor, and it pained her beyond measure to have to tell the rest of the story with her present.
“Oh, my dear,” she said bustling forward. Her arms squeezed Anna in a genuine hug before she prattled on. “We were so concerned. When you called, I almost got dressed and came over immediately. Had it not been for Harry fitting you in first thing, why I would’ve never lasted the night. I hope you don’t mind me here. I just know that whatever you need, the Spirit of God has asked me to personally help you, and I would feel honored if you’d let me know what that looks like.”
“Eleanor, dear—” Pastor Harry interrupted, “It’s the most amazing and truly wonderful news. Anna is pregnant. God saw fit to send another little miracle our way—another addition to Steven’s legacy.”
Eleanor gasped in astonishment. “My dear, you never said a thing.” Her eyes traveled down Anna’s slim frame to rest upon her abdomen.
“Why, I look far more pregnant than you do.” She laughed as she patted her round tummy.
Without a breath between she rattled on. “You’re one of the strongest women I know. If only the rest of the church body knew how to take things to the Lord first, before running poor Harry ragged as if he was the Almighty himself.” She clucked her tongue. “You’ve always been the rock-solid one. We could all take lessons from you. You help out at the retirement home, attend choir practice, and find peace in the midst of your grief by giving to others. Why, the other ladies and I just marvel at your strength of character and generous spirit.”
Anna had never felt more the hypocrite than she did in that minute. Every word Eleanor spoke only served to drive the nails deeper into the coffin of lies that she now felt surrounded by. The four walls of this box squeezed in, the weight of her omission lowered her into darkness. The lid creaked shut and she felt suffocation take over.
Anna found herself surrounded in a circle of prayer with both the pastor and his wife praying up a storm. They pleaded with God for a safe delivery, prayed others would come around and give support, and that Anna would have health and strength in the months to come. They prayed, and prayed, and prayed, for everything except what she needed—the strength to tell the truth.

Before she could grasp the wherefore and the why, Anna was on her way home in complete and utter shock. She turned the radio off and felt annoyed by the cheerful sun. How had something she knew to be the right thing to do, turn out so wrong? In truth, the lie grew bigger and better than she herself could have concocted, and she had prayed … so maybe, just maybe this is what they call divine intervention.
The truth will set you free.
Anger surged as Anna entered the house. She slammed her purse down on the kitchen island and stomped to her room. She fell on the bed in a heap. “It’s nobody’s business who the father is. This child might as well have a beautiful legacy rather than sordid history. It’s destined to grow up without a father anyway. Matt’s way too busy. And God, I’m not aborting the baby, surely that’s what matters the most? Besides, I raised my other two virtually alone, and I can do it again.”
Relief poured over her. The more she thought things through, the better it got.
I won’t have to tell my sons or in-laws. To remain quiet makes perfect sense—far better than the pain and shame the truth will bring to my family. And I won’t lose the respect of others. Who in their right mind would argue with that? I’ll get everyone’s help rather than their gossip and scorn. She rolled over and spoke out loud. “Now, that’s a blessing too good to pass up.
“And, God, I didn’t tell one lie. Can it be that you understand and this is your hand of grace—after all my suffering, I’m finally getting a break?”
Rationalization danced in her head. Deliverance lay spread before her until the thought of Matt bit into her consciousness. Like a ferocious attack from an angry Pitbull, a bite-size chunk ripped the comfort from her reasoning.
She’d have to deal with Matt. He was the only one who knew the truth. But their worlds never met, so this wouldn’t be too hard. He lived, worked, and socialized in different circles, and he certainly didn’t attend church, so the chance of keeping this from him seemed doable.
One caveat—she would have to do something about the way he kept showing up on her doorstep. This had to be dealt with immediately, before she was showing. No more skirting around the unavoidable. She had to squelch any hope he had of them becoming a couple.
A pang of regret flooded her soul. As much as she wanted to lie to herself about that night, she couldn’t. They had connected in a way that went far beyond a mere indiscretion, but he could never know. He was a heartache waiting to happen anyhow. The heartache might as well begin now.
Anna, the truth will set you free.
She buried her head under her pillow and ignored the voice.


If only Matt had left her alone after that one night, life would be much easier. Instead, he’d sent flowers, dropped off chocolates, wrote a hauntingly beautiful letter, and left too many phone messages to count. He’d begged to see her, but she had ignored the plea. She knew she owed him an explanation but couldn’t find the courage, all too aware of the attraction between them. Now, however, her